Jason Edward Posluszny

Just got an email a few days ago... one of Jason’s favorite bands, Hollywood Undead, is coming to Orlando October 23rd. This will be the first time that Hollywood Undead has played in Tampa or Orlando and me and Jason haven’t been there in that crowd together... (Along with Dalyce, of course).

In fact, my default picture is the three of us at the first Hollywood Undead show.

The hardest part about this news wasn’t just accepting the fact that I won’t ever be able to go to another show, be in another mosh pit, or sing along with Jason to our favorite songs at a show ever again.

The hardest part was seeing the co-headliner of the tour: Atreyu. If Jason made a top 3 list of his favorite bands, Atreyu would be in it. I know how insanely excited Jason would be to hear that Hollywood Undead and Atreyu are playing Orlando together. He wouldn’t even believe it if you told him, that’s how awesome of a lineup that is.

They are both really big names in the rock world. I couldn’t believe these two bands were playing together. As soon as I saw the email, my first instinct was to call Jason and tell him. For a very brief moment, I forgot what happened.

So I know that Me and Dalyce will go without him. It will never be the same without him there with us, but not going isn’t an option. We have to go for him. So much of who he is lives inside their music. For me, being able to re-experience something that I know made him so happy is priceless. I can say for certain that some of his happiest moments in his life happened at those shows. I’ll never forget how happy he was after both shows, especially the one where he met everyone in the band.

I know Ashley wants to go. If anyone else wants to go, let me know.

Below is a few pictures of Jason with the band and actual video I found on Jason’s camera that he filmed himself at the last show we went to. The audio sucks but the video is absolutely awesome. Check it out.

All the details of the dream arent remembered but here is how it went..

i was expecting jason and was ready to ask him as much as i could. we talked about one specific tattoo found on his computer.. the music note one. he said to me " i am getting that tomorrow" and we both looked at eachother a little shocked and saddend because without saying anything we both knew that wasnt possible. we moved on without even acknowledging he had said that.

we then talked about his game account and he told me " everything is good with that. it is ok"

i asked him if there was anything he needed to tell me. if there was anything he needed to say. if there was something he wanted me to tell his mom?

he said to tell her " at the end of the movie.. the song that plays at the end" i looked at him a little confused and he said " she will understand."

if there was anymore to the dream i dont remember. this happend a few weeks ago. i had told a few people already. but after seeing what jan had got as her jason tattoo i knew i needed to share this with everyone.

when i told gail about the dream. the first thing that came to her mind was the movie ghost town matt had rented for her to watch after we lost jason. the song at the end of the movie is the heart of life by john mayer.

also when matt called jason game account. they refunded jasons money without even sending the games back and there were no issues or anything. easy as pie.

i am really shocked thats what jan got as her tattoo because even though jason him self didnt get that on his body.. in a way he did through jan. i never told jan about my dream.

Jan:  Sep 12, 2009 4:49 PM

 

holy crap. holy crap. literally i’m floored. it’s hard for me to type this! my brain can’t tell my hands what to do! wow. wow. i seriously am floored dalyce. wow. holy crap. your dream, i can’t even put into words a description of it because "amazing" and every other "powerful word" just doesn’t seem enough to really capture the power of that dream. i’m stunned. seriously. my brain can’t tell my mouth the words to say. i feel like the blond kid at the end of Karate Kid..."sweep-a-floor." :) all the rainbows & song moments literally just got K-O’ed with your dream b/c it speaks MEASURES. he came, not just thru a rainbow or a song...he came to you!

i do not believe in "coincidence" and I genuinely believe that there is a purpose for each & everything in our lives...some call it fate, desitny, "God’s Plan, " etc. i have been thinking of a meaningful tattoo to get that would truly honor jason...fittingly honor him. i didn’t want to get his dragoon tattoo b/c i felt that was his immediate family that had that honor. that’s what has taken me so long to get one b/c i didn’t want to "settle" for just some silly flower (as I was initially going with). and then when i was looking at matt’s profile, the new pics of jas & reminicing thru many of them...i came upon the music note tattoo & i just knew, something in my gut was telling me that THIS would & should be the tattoo. when i was waiting for them to draw it up (some minor changes had to be done so that when i aged, the tattoo would still look as it does instead of bleeding into one), I’d thought that I would continue the bar thru a musical score of a very poignant song later on. i’d been thinking of some classics (Stand By Me), some very Modern (Hollywood Undead - Young or This Love, This Hate) but when I was printing sheet music, the websites only gave a sampling of the first verse but none of the songs I was considering truly "got" it. I just listened to "The Heart of Life, " strange b/c I was crying as I read your dream Dalyce, & the first lyrics of the song are "I hate to see you cry...there’s things you need to hear...so turn off your tears and listen." and in the span of two seconds, Dalyce had given me the perfect song...the ONLY song that could come close to literally put Jason’s life, his heart, everything about him...into a very simple & PERFECT song.

Trish: Sep 12, 2009 11:07 PM

 

That dream was crazy Dal. It’s very strange how all these things keep happening. I don’t think they are all just coincidence. 

Me (Gail) Sep 13, 2009 2:22 PM

 

After Dal told me about her dream, the only movie I could think of was Ghost town. Matt rented it for me and told me I HAD to watch it, that it would make me feel better. I watched it probably at least 5 times.

Usually when Jas rented movies it was when he was going to a friends. He get them from red box on his way home from work, drop them off on his way back, so he didnt really being many movies home for us to watch together.

My thinking is this. Jason sends Matt a message, rent that movie, make mom watch it, then sends me a message through Dal’s dream, and the song.

I keep going over it in my mind, have for weeks, was there any other movie, I dont think so. I think that was it.

Jan your tattoo floored us. Perfect choice and maybe also destined. There are so many other things. Another example. I have been designing the decal for the sides of Jason’s explorer. Taken me a week to get it right. Ill post pictures when i finally get it on the truck. She is making it now.

It’s a shooting star with flares coming off the back of the star. Mixed in with the flares are small stars. One of the flares is longer and I have Jas’s dragon’s talon grasping that flare, the end of the shooting star.

I really wanted to get the rainbow "thing" in there somehow, so I thought well, a shooting star is high up in the sky, above the rainbows... so on the decal it says, "Somewhere Over The Rainbow".

Matt and I talked about it (Trish too) and Matt’s feeling was it should be a strong font, a Jason type font. So I went searching through hundreds of fonts. I found 2, one was called Anger. That was the one i thought looked most like the way Jas wrote when he was doodling or something. I sent the woman making the decal the name of the 2 fonts. The only difference in the second one was it was a little more compressed. old her I wanted to use the Anger font.

Next morning as Im once again going through more of Jason’s things, I opened one of his art folders out of his senior year book bag. Forst thing i opened that morning. There was a folded paper right on the top of one side. I opened it up and you will not believe what was printed on it. One word, Anger, printed with the same Anger font I found. I was blown away. Out of the hundreds of fonts i looked at, I found the same font he used and had printed out.

SO many things. They are not coincidence. He is guiding us. I truly believe that.

John Mayer’s song, The heart of life, is beautiful, and I believe was intended to send me a message. Please don’t cry and that my love for him will always keep our hearts together. I still cry, all the time, but I try to remember that song and his message to help stop the tears.